Fiqo.blogspot.com: An Exemplary Blog In All Aspects.

National Day Rally 2008

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

(I received enough of "Afiq, why you never update" or similar messages to actually publish this post. This post was completed one week ago but my finger forgot to move and click "publish".)

( :D )

(This post and all posts before this are super lame. If you said something like: "This is lame, it is not even funny." then your eyesight may have a bit of a problem and you are experiencing a lot of problems trying to figure out what the words look like.)

(Due to the graphic nature of this post, readers are suggested to close their eyes as they scroll this internet page down. Please open your eyes only when your computer crash. Or when your computer screen black out, whichever comes first.)

(Words that are commonly used to describe some terms are replaced with more complex words to achieve decency. If you don't understand what the words try to mean, you're below 16.)

Yup. That was a long and irritating disclaimer.

National Day has passed and I really enjoyed watching the Beijing Olympic opening ceremony, I mean, come on, 2008 people on the field banging drums? Of course its nice. A typical 40 pupil class cant even keep their mouth closed, and organizing 2008 people to smack drums in unison is a great feat.

But something else other than THAT is important. THIS, if it continues to occur, will render having 2008 people drumming together impossible in Singapore. And that is.... Aging Population (American spelling. For those who will tag hate message to me stating that i spelt "ageing" as "aging". So irritating).

I blame it on ultra good contraceptive methods such as condoms, pills and cement.

Like previously said in this blog:-

It mentioned that people buying condoms will "go buy a Mentos and a newspaper" and approach the counter hoping that it will look natural. If you go to a nearby 7-11, you will notice that the cashier is extremely close to the condom cabinet a.k.a. condom heaven. The reason is "convenience". Certainly, you dont want to be seen walking to the back of the shop, choosing a flavour (Yes, flavour of a condom. Some people consume condoms. Not me.), then reaching out, grab the condom and returning to the counter and saying, "I am in a rush, dont ask me any question, how much is this?".

Okay, maybe not cement. I was thinking that if they cement the appropriate places, they would not be able to carry out procreation, then the population will start to age. There are many consequences of an aging population. There are not enough people to push our seniors who are wheelchair-bound thus, motors are used to actually push them around. Most pedestrian bridges in Singapore are built to increase mobility from one side to another side, especially for the disabled. Nah, just kidding.

Statistics have shown that the average children per couple in Singapore is "1.2". This is very worrying as the first baby has one whole body, but the next baby that every couple give birth to has only 1 fifth of what it should be.

"I was happy to have a second child! I shouted and shouted, alas! It came out. The doctor then said 'Your baby looks like an arm.' " - A mother, who feels sad about having 1.2 babies in total.

The government wants to increase the likelihood of couples and will be doing so by having match making events where they will be paired based on these characteristics...

1) Gender

The groom MUST be a male. The bride MUST be a female. I mean...come on. If both of them are of the same gender, their tools will not reciprocate, leading to the lack of procreation.

2) Number of legs

Most couples in Singapore have four legs in total. If a couple have one leg or three or more legs, then life would be difficult for them as their "procreation geolocation" will have to be differed and this will lengthen the time it takes to increase the population by 1 person.

3) Amount of Xbox360s and Playstation3s they have bought

People who have more then 3 Xbox360s will likely not have a chance to carry out procreation because they will be occupied with their games. Even worse, they will be distracted by Dead or Alive characters that will make them love them more than their wives (or wife).

I got this SMS a few months back and it may help increase the number of couples in Singapore:-

Written with a pen, sealed with a kiss.
If you are my friend, answer me this.
"Are we friend or are we not?"
You told me once but i forgot.

So tell me once and tell me true.
So I can say: "I'm here for you."
And if I die before you do.
I will wait in heaven and wait for you.

I appreciate friends, do you?

Send it to your CLOSEST and DEAREST friends and see how many you get!

1 to 8: You're loved by most
More than 8: You have wasted more than 8 messages.

(plus the time taken)

_____

The poem is quite catchy and I memorized it already. I feel like extending this post but resisted the urge because I just received some homework on Additional Math through email. Either I delete my email or I complete the homework. I choose the latter.

And I saw this irritating sentence(s) in friendster.com a while ago:-

"

dunhav..hahs.y lehx?go find out urself lahx..ya lahx nt siao lahx.."

Credits to:

wahpiangeh.com for providing the picture of the PM of Singapore in the National Day Rally speech. (First picture.)

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How subjects taught in school benefit us - Part 6

Friday, August 08, 2008

(Note: This is the 2nd version of this post. The previous version, reigning for about 12 hours, was missing two pictures that were supposed to be in this post but left out due to the webmaster's lack of sleep yesterday.)

After a quite a break from blogging....No, correction: after being busy with my school's preliminary examinations, I lay my hands on my keyboard and will attempt to press random alphabets to create this post.

Which lead me to type random words about Combined Humanities, which is History and Social Studies joined together into one big subject.

Through this subject, we learn to analyze sources that are given to us and link the sources to each other and the given topic. In real life, this is EXTREMELY helpful. In the case of Mas Selamat, sources were pasted onto bus stops and MRT stations to let the commuters infer and act upon what is given to them.

__________

This is a rectangular picture that shows "Call 999 immediately if you see him" in another language, which is the Malay language. The line below "Call 999 immediately if you see him" looks like straight lines that is a bit curved and placed very near each other in blocks. There is this two lines that almost look like an "A", but the line between the two almost-vertical lines is absent.

The line that is two lines below "

Call 999 immediately if you see him" are scribbles by a three year old boy named Dave. I don't really know who he is, so I think it is up to you to find out. At the end of the day, it is you who is marking this paper, not me.

Above "Call 999 immediately if you see him", there is "POLICE NOTICE". I don't really understand what it means because in the English language, only the first letter of the sentence should be capitalized, the rest are not except for proper nouns. "POLICE NOTICE" has 12 capital letters, so I think, there are 12 sentences but the rest of the alphabets are too small, probably squeezed in between the capital letters.

There are four boxes below the sentences. It is shaded blue and there seems to be a brown object in the vast amount of blue surrounding it. I am not really sure what it looks like. Either my laptop screen is spoilt or my eyes are closed.

I conclude that the source looks rectangular.

__________

With the skill learnt through Combined Humanities, looking at posters in public places is a much easier job. There is little need to ask around to know what the poster is about, reducing embarrassment and wasted energy from asking around.

_______________

You: Err, sir, what is that banana being like...you know...wrapped in a plastic. I mean, come on, they are like squeezed in that plastic or latex looking rubber. And worse still, I think the banana is yellow. Oh wait, all bananas are yellow. And Chicken Rice is nice.

Man: That, my friend, is an advertisement from a company called SSL International based in UK. It is about condominiums.

You: Condominiums? You mean, the latex rubber thing is a condo?

Man: No, condom.

You: Oh yeah.

_______________

The questions in Combined Humanities (CH) are designed to engage the student into a thinking process. The questions are very challenging to the extent that the student will have to write workings as a man's mental capabilities are downtroddened by the processing needed to answer the questions.

Example:-

To what extent was the Policy Of Appeasement the cause for the death of Britney Spears? Explain your answer.

Model Answer:

It was to an extent of such extent that I cant take this anymore. The death of Britney Spears was caused by the Policy Of Appeasement. I love her a lot. To explain my answer is an insult to Britney Spears, look at her:-

She just completed NS and she still need time for her hair to grow.

_________________

Tomorrow is National Day! And today was the eve, so my school had a celebration, called National Day CUM Awards Day 2008. The good thing about this year's celebration was that the National Day celebration was not diluted by the award giving ceremonies. Last year's "celebration" was more of staring at people who got awards than pretending that we like this country :D (We love Singapore).

After that, I went to the Arena to play pool and bowl. And yes, I won the most games in bowling :D We took some pictures. All pictures are fake. Seriously. When girls take photos of themselves, they ALWAYS take pictures of only one side of their face, because the other side usually has pimples and cancerous cells and probably AIDS symptoms.

Today is 08/08/2008. It LOOKS like 080808, but its not. Its more like 08082008. I really dont know how many couples are created today, cause many people think that today is a special day. In fact, people in Sudan are still dying in large numbers, many people are still affected by AIDS/HIV and Powerpuff Girls still dont exist. Its not funny, dont laugh.

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Introduction

A Singaporean male teenager living in Singapore.

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How subjects taught in school benefit us P1
How subjects taught in school benefit us P2
How subjects taught in school benefit us P3
How subjects taught in school benefit us P4
How subjects taught in school benefit us P5

The Shrek Series Part 1
The Shrek Series Part 2

SONY vs Microsoft Part 1
SONY vs Microsoft Part 2
SONY vs Microsoft Part 3
SONY vs Microsoft Part 4

The Finger series: Middle finger
The Finger series: Index finger
The Finger series: Downward pointing finger

The Mas Selamat Series: Part 1
The Mas Selamat Series: Part 2